When I was a young teenager, my quiet, steadfast stepfather gave me a lamp. Not an electric lamp, but one in which oil is the fuel and a wick provides the light. He attached a small note to the gift. It said, “Your word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto […]

Driving into town, on my way to yoga, I found myself at my old office. How’d that happen? After all, they aren’t even in the same neighborhood. Well, I drove the route to that office for many years and autopilot took over as I took the familiar exit rather than paying attention to where I […]

“How are you?” When the bank teller or the grocery store clerk asks me that, I tell the truth—either in my tone or with my vocabulary. It’s a small rebellion I enjoy as a change from the conventional, “I’m fine.” In most instances, my truth-telling is rather unremarkable. However, on the occasion when I’m fuming […]

One of the first words a child learns is the word “no.” Ask any two-year-old if they want an ice cream cone, and they’ll say “no” even as they reach for it. They know the word; they know it’s a way to express their burgeoning independence. But sometimes they’re not quite clear on its meaning. […]

It was 2006 at Easter Brunch out in the Texas Hill Country. Carol, a mom of my son’s classmate was grumbling about her dog, a young, yellow lab named Henry. They really loved him, but were very concerned that they’d have to give him away due to his escape artistry. “He jumps the fence all […]

  Tragedy strikes. And it breaks our heart open. Sometimes we get stretched beyond all reason, beyond all endurance, to the point of breaking. Seeing it, my heart goes out with compassion.   Compassion for ourselves, for our daily failures. Compassion for others, for helplessness in the face of powers greater than human. Compassion that […]

“That sounds so selfish.” That comment is voiced regularly in my office and I’m delighted when I hear it. It shows me that there’s some awareness of a feeling that’s uncomfortable enough to examine. Usually, the “that sounds so selfish” question comes from the belief that the wishes of others should come first. That’s the […]

Do you go down rabbit holes? Does it take you off course? My invitation to rabbit holes is resistance. For me, resistance is not so much about staying stuck in one place as it is about not staying the course. Instead of persisting, of staying the course, I resist—by chasing rabbits. I’d much rather race […]

Late last summer I had to change my route from home to wherever I was headed. The most expedient, convenient, logical way from my house to the main thoroughfare was inaccessible. My road was closed. I could no longer take my familiar way through by driving around barriers or outwitting the road construction. A new […]

Ever get to that place where you “lose your cool”? The hotter it gets, it seems, the easier it is to lose it. And when you loose your cool, nobody feels good afterwards. Your target doesn’t like that kind of attention, and then there’s the guilt that swamps over you, leaving shame and embarrassment in […]